People respond better to messages that are phrased positively. That is why caref
ID: 395491 • Letter: P
Question
People respond better to messages that are phrased positively. That is why careful business writers convey information positively whenever possible. This doesn't mean disguising or misrepresenting the facts. It means avoiding negative words (such as complaint, fail, mistake) and finding positive ways to express ideas. You provide more options to readers when you tell what can be done instead of what can't be done.
Rewrite each sentence in the space provided. Be sure to write a full sentence.
Original: You failed to tell us your color choice, so we are unable to complete your order
Revision: As soon as we receive your color choice, we will complete your order.
Try your skill at converting the following from negative to positive messages.
1. You cannot submit your application until January 1.
2. We can't send the digital camera you ordered because we are out of stock until March 1, when we will begin shipping again.
3. As we gather customer information, we would like to know if you have any complaints about our products or services.
4. Your June 2 letter claims that you were treated rudely by our customer service agent.
5. We will have to refuse your claim if we don't receive your application before September 1.
6. The footings on this new home can't be poured until it stops raining.
7. In the event that a client is unable to submit a completed enrollment card, we cannot enroll a spouse as a dependent in the group insurance plan.
8. Liberty Mutual refuses to process any claim not accompanied by documented proof from a physician showing that the injuries were treated.
9. You won't be sorry that you applied for a Capitol One credit card.
10. Without the support of the entire community, the new athletic field cannot be built.
Explanation / Answer
Answer
1. You can submit your application after January 1.
2.we are running out of stock for the digital camera you ordered, we will be shipping it after March 1.
3. Please let us know how u feel about our products or services, as we gather customer information for improvement.
4. We found from your letter claim dated June 2 that, you are not satisfied with the treatment of our service agent.
5. You are required to provide your application before September first to avoid refusal.
6. Footings on the new home can be poured after the rain stops.
7. We can enroll the client's spouse's as a dependent in group insurance plan when the client submit a completed enrollment card to us.
8. Liberty Mutual process claims which are accompanied bydocumented proof from a physician showing that the injuries were treated.
9. You will be satisfied by applying for a copitol one credit card.
10. The new athletic field can't be built by the support of entire community.
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